Wednesday, November 28, 2007

Accento - Killing You Softly With His Words

Accento was born Robert Frankstien in 1976 in a small suburb outside of Baltimore. It was 1988 while in elementrary school that he was double-dog-dared to take on local bully James Pecan in a tongue-twister battle of Peter Piper Picked a Peck of Pickles. That fateful battle would eventually put him on the world map.

Just as it seemed Robert was defeated, he looked deep inside himself and in a Dragon Ball-Z moment unleashed his full power. He then performed the Piper tongue twister followed seamlessly with Six sick slick slim sycamore saplings, A box of biscuits, a batch of mixed biscuits, A skunk sat on a stump and thunk the stump stunk, but the stump thunk the skunk stunk.......

and just as his hair began to stand on end, he went into warp speed and shouted.
Betty Botter had some butter,
"But," she said, "this butter's bitter.
If I bake this bitter butter,
it would make my batter bitter.
But a bit of better butter--
that would make my batter better."

So she bought a bit of butter,
better than her bitter butter,
and she baked it in her batter,
and the batter was not bitter.
So 'twas better Betty Botter
bought a bit of better butter.
Robert Frankstien died that day, and Accento was born.

Accento went on to produce three number one selling rap albumns. Hordes of women would flock to him after shows from the rumor of his mutant-powered tongue strength. Accento was on top of the world. It seemed nothing could stop him. Unfortunatly, his mutant stength proved useless in battle.

In a rage of jealousy 50-cent killed Accento with three glock-9 shots to the chest, stating "thake that you sthilly bith." Accento died at the age of 31. At his funeral the Micro-Machines guy showed up and paid his respects.

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